I have to admit, I’ve put some pressure on myself with this blog. I want to make the words that fall into place here *matter.* And in that drive for perfection, I have a small tendency to hold back from starting until I feel more confident I can produce something that I think matters.
So, this post here is to acknowledge to myself that not everything needs to be perfect immediately, or even the first and second time around. This is a space for my ideas and activities. A space to share with the world some of the things I think, feel, and do. And I can’t forget that my ability to be direct and candid is admired by quite a few and THAT is what my friends would expect of me. Be true to me. Do what matters to me. The words will fall into place once I remember to keep that one point in mind.
With all that being said:
Just a little something I wrote back in high school, January 25, 2001.
We, as humans, wake up each morning with a desire for acceptance and, more importantly, love. We strive to find it and keep it. We exist to feel it. We exist to feel love. Why is it then, that we go against this instinct, and hate? Why do we hate in order to find love and acceptance?
If we fill our hearts with hatred towards even the most minute of things, there is that much less room we have to keep the love we find. Hating things will not make us look any better to anyone else. If we succumb to hate, we become weak. We become worthless creatures who are hardly deserving of pity, much less love. If we hate, it will only bring us ignorance and rejection. What sense could one make of hating something or someone to find approval? It may bring us a temporary satisfaction but it isn’t real. It isn’t enough. and it only makes us feel worse in the long run as we witness the pain we’ve caused and the scorn in their eyes when they see us.
It must stop. And it starts with us. It starts with a look into our own hearts to see just how much space we’ve given to hate. It starts with our personal initiative to throw away old hate within ourselves. If we accept one person and look past their hatred and see them for who they truly can be, then we’ve possibly opened the doorway for another soul who would never have touched the right knob had we not shown them a positive direction. By doing this, we’ve also opened the right door for ourselves. We’re one room closer to total love and acceptance.